57: in the midst of busyness

I'm a teacher, and the year starts Monday. A week and a half ago, all the teachers returned to the small Christian school in the middle of nowhere. I was so busy getting my room ready, going to meetings, and juggling a million ideas, that I thought, "A guy? What do I need a guy for? I'm so busy!" And enjoying it too.

Then this last week, maybe Tuesday, I found out that instead of teaching a combo class of 2nd and 3rd graders, I'll also be doing the majority of teaching for 4th grade as well.

I think my world must have tilted a little on its axis.

Despite knowing that this is where God wants me and that He's with me, and I could write a whole post about that, my stress level has gone through the roof the last few days. This last year since I first taught in a classroom, I've largely avoided that miserable sensation that makes you wake up in the morning already overwhelmed. I didn't miss it.

Although my busyness and mental preoccupation has increased ten-fold, I've found myself in the evening hours being struck by a strange acute loneliness. Brief, but strong.

The first couple weeks before school starts has got to be a time of deprivation for fellows who are dating/married to teachers. We obsess out of necessity, because if we didn't, it wouldn't get done.

But even though I wouldn't be able to spend any time with a fellow if I had one right now, and even though he would be a distraction, and maybe that would even add to my stress, I sure wouldn't mind having a husband to lean on emotionally when I want to cry and say I can't do this. I can't teach three grades at once, even though I've been blessed with an aide.

It is not good for man to be alone. I will make an helpmeet fit for him.

I'm leaning on God, and He is holding me up.