The question used to be can you be "just friends" with a guy.
The question for me now is can you have instant message conversations with a guy on Facebook without leading him on and him thinking you like him?
I mean, I just minimized three instant message conversations I'm in the middle of with three guys that I'm not interested in!
I don't know. I wish I had someone to ask.
Would my future husband be bothered that I discussed favorite music with one and offered a virtual cookie to another over instant messenger on Facebook? And enjoyed doing so?
Am I willing to forego virtual male company even if it means I suffer that horrid alone feeling I know so well?
What does God think?
I don't want to be bound by extrabiblical rules. I do want to be wise and live rightly. I don't want to threaten my future husband. I don't want to be careless with others' feelings.
Lord, grant me wisdom.
(Maybe I'll find someone with brothers who will get their input for me!)
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| me at the reunion talking about church with two edited-faceless-for-privacy guys as we wait for the talent show to start |
Ha! The editing definitely improves my appearance.
ReplyDeleteAs for the substance of your post, I doubt any future husband would say, "Hey! I wanted that digital cookie!" Guys understand that they have to win a girl's heart against all other comers.
Dudes, she said that there were three guys trying to get her attention who she is not interested in. But she didn't say that there were no guys that she is interested in. The only way to know which group you are in is to ask.
Thanks, Jeremy! :)
ReplyDeleteAnd lol that of all guys, the one to actually read my post is the one whose face is (not) featured here!
A wise man once counseled Tom and I on this topic. His gist was that friends of the opposite sex are fine, as long as you're closely guarding your heart against having conversations that 'bare your soul'.
ReplyDeleteConversations that reveal your personal thoughts, insecurities, and emotions are to be reserved for your husband. If you believe you are on the path towards marriage with a man, I think he would fall in the same category. Only you can know that line between what is an innocent conversation between friends, and what is more to you. I doubt that sending a digital cookie or discussing music cross that line, but only you can say for sure :).
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ReplyDeleteI'd say the answer is yes. You have to run the risk of them "liking" you in order to be an open "available" single woman. (as opposed to "not available" or "not interested" I-want-to-stay-single woman) A woman needs to be open to the men in her life - open as in projecting sincere friendliness, kindness, politeness, and also openness to a guy expressing interest. And it's hard to turn that completely off and on, so generally all good guys probably need to treated about the same way. I have spent most of my adult life be way to careful and closed, so I'm no expert... but my brothers tell me this is what I need to do. lol
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