As
a single, sometimes marriage becomes an object. It is something you try to get.
Or
we think of it like a portal into another world. You have no idea what the
other world is like, but it must be Narnian in its magical qualities.
But
we forget--unintentionally, temporarily--the relationship part of marriage.
Edward
entered Narnia with his grumpy jealousies and wreaked havoc. Narnia was
magical, but they still had to contend with the White Witch. We haven't tried
merging our lives with another selfish being--like us.
Marriage
is not an object or a portal. It is a building. It looks sturdy and safe and
appealing from the perspective of a visitor. But the architect and construction
crew know that you don't just say, "I want a beautiful house," and
bam! it's there. It takes a lot of planning and starting and backing up and
re-figuring, dealing with pipes bursting, and the city finding something wrong
with the electricity, and the tile costing more than you planned, and the
roofer taking twice as long as promised. On the worst days, you wonder if it
was worth the headache to take this on.
Is
it worth the labor? Yes. Oh yes. Because then you have a beautiful home that
you built. There is pride and satisfaction and shelter.
But
it's not an object to snatch up. This building is not up for auction. It's just
a piece of land--maybe not even cleared of brush and rubble accumulated from
the past. It's a portal into another world, sure--but that world is an untamed frontier
you will have to pioneer.
Still sound romantic?
Actually, yeah, it does. :D
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