127: takin' it to the Lord in prayer

I was getting ready for bed, thinking how it was getting late but I needed to spend God time, so I started praying as I washed up.

Lord, I pray--

I paused.

--that continuous, every day prayer.

I paused.

But that I rarely pray. Lord, I pray for a--

Any guess what comes next? It starts with hus and ends with band.

But I'm sure God was sick of hearing about that. Even if I actually don't pray for it very often. He hears my thoughts. He sees the constant theme and figuring out. I feel like I'm imposing, bringing it up to Him again. Like He'll tell me to drop it for once.

That is not God. Humans, yes. Humans reacting to that obsessive, teenage chatterbox in us that thinks the same pathetic thoughts over and over.

But God? Do I need to be ashamed to ask God about what I have already spent hours thinking about?

A friend shared the other day over potatoes and pancakes that she thinks the danger is not in what we think but is instead in not including God in our thoughts.

I can think and think and think, but the real action that can actually do something is stepping away from the drama on the lawn, running up onto the porch, and asking Mr. God about it. Yes, He sees it already and knows how silly some of my thoughts have been. But He doesn't reproach. He gives wisdom liberally to those who ask.

So even though the prayer for a husband and wisdom about boy-related issues might sound redundant and drama-ish and even stupid to an average human, I'm going to remember to feel free to take it to God anyway. He's been in my head for 29 years and still loves me. I think He can take my excessive wondering still.