Tuesday, October 31, 2017

230: can't whine, so what then?

You know what the blessing of singleness is? I can't blame any unhappiness on my insensitive husband or on my chaotic kids. I can blame it on what I don't have, but the blessing of prolonged singleness is that, if you're not actively going on dates, blaming stuff on singleness starts sounding like whining and stops being socially acceptable, like complaining about your spouse and kids still is (contrary to God's way, fyi).

You then find yourself forced to either be that negative whiner or, instead, wrestle with God about your feelings. Social acceptability for once has the potential to direct us toward God and sanctification and maybe even intentional thankfulness.

So, ouch though it may be, today's blessing is that whining about being single is not socially acceptable.
Ever need to complain less?


Ok, this post may be a stretch, and it's more a blessing IN than OF singleness, but this is my last post for the month! Hoozah! I'll be posting the complete list of links soon if you want to look back on the other quirky things I've been thankful for this month. :) May God continue to increase our awareness of His many blessings. Ciao!



I have inconsistently participated in "Write 31 Days," where a bunch of bloggers write...for 31 days. My theme has been "This My Single Life," with a focus on the blessings of this season. Hopefully it's obvious to anyone who knows me or has read my blog that I want to be married and have kids. But at 32 years old, I am quite single, and I think it's God-glorifying to highlight the good things God has given me with singleness. Click here to access the links for my 31 days of writing! And if you want to read everyone else's blog posts, go to http://write31days.com/ and click "Linking Up" for the categories!

Monday, October 30, 2017

229: different is normal

Seriously running out of unique things specifically related to singleness to be thankful for!

As it is late for a school night, this will be brief (that, and it's hard to come up with anything I haven't already said).

As a single living at home still, my life is very much not like the lives of other believers I may interact with. I met with two older ladies tonight for "triad" (like a community group but with only 3 people). They were talking about their adult children and grandchildren.

Mmm, well, I've got my parents?

But isn't that what life and the body of Christ consists of? Interacting with people in different stages and seasons than yourself. Feeling a little like I've been stuck in the same stage for the last 32 years--granted, growing in maturity over the years within this stage--I feel a bit behind the times listening to these ladies talk. But no matter what stage of life we are in, there will always be someone else who is in a different stage that we can't quite relate to even if we listen and "understand" what they are saying.

So today's blessing of singleness is the opportunities to interact with differences, deal with that rub within myself, accept this path as ok and their path as ok, and learn yet again that different is okay, not on opportunity for envy or exclusion or blahness.

Restating this again...

It can feel as a semi-older single that most people are in a different category than yourself, but the truth is there are multiple seasons, and whatever season you are in will look different from another's. I think of my friend with a son whose illness probably means a shortened lifespan. How can her life path be compared to another young married's? We all have unique lives.

So I am thankful for the chance to learn that a bit now.

This is my single life. Any of my Eeyore-ness of "poor me" fades in light of truth.

What different stages of life are you glad you get to interact with?

P.S. Oh, and learning to accept that other people might not get my struggles, might have no clue about my journey of wrestling with my current season, and that's an opportunity too to either communicate or to get to the place where I don't need to be understood to be secure in the place where God has me, ie. in His hand, which ironically is where "they" are resting too.

P.P.S. Apparently I am more long-winded than brief when I haven't time. :P No time to be concise!

I am participating in "Write 31 Days," where a bunch of bloggers write...for 31 days. My theme is "This My Single Life," with a focus on the blessings of this season. Hopefully it's obvious to anyone who knows me or has read my blog that I want to be married and have kids. But at 32 years old, I am quite single, and I think it's God-glorifying to highlight the good things God has given me with singleness. Click here to access the links for my 31 days of writing! And if you want to read everyone else's blog posts, go to http://write31days.com/ and click "Linking Up" for the categories!

Sunday, October 29, 2017

228: unexpected reminder

It's been a temporarily rough weekend in the singleness department. No, no drama to speak of, just a sudden WHACK! of "hey, remember? it's just you. no male half. no other side of the equation. no, 'and God saw the man and woman and it was good.'" And then, I think I was on my blog and glanced at the post from last Christmas Eve. Or somehow Christmas Eve came into my head. And WHAM! hey, you get to be the in-between, unattached person again this year. Your niece is MARRIED, your 70+ yr old widowed aunt has a BOYFRIEND. It's not that I want a fiancĂ© for Christmas or even a boyfriend (let's not be greedy now). I just don't want to be the only person at our family event that is winging it solo.

So what am I thankful for, specific to singleness?

Well, I was communicating my woes to some girls in a Facebook group (probably too much so), and a girl I have never met in person (cuz that's how we roll in 2017), but who had liked one of my recent blogposts replied to me with this:

"Just bring those 30 days of gratitude posts with you and remember you ARE special, God just has you serving a different way right now."

Exactly what I wanted to hear? No, I wanted to hear of a rent-a-plus-one website like in Holiday Engagement and Hitched for the Holidays. Just kidding. Kinda.

But, I am thankful for the reminder that . . .

. . . there are things to be grateful for. And He does have my life in His hands. And He is working. And while I don't have grand hopes of enjoying this year's Christmas Eve (sometimes the stiff upper lip is rather elusive), my life is not in vain. It has eternal purpose, eternal meaning. What more could I ask for?

I needed that reminder again. So thanks, you-know-who-you-are, for the love and Christian fellowship. Truly. It means a lot.

This is my single life. It takes a community.

Where have you received unexpected encouragement lately?
one of my 2nd grader's handwriting work this week <3
I am participating in "Write 31 Days," where a bunch of bloggers write...for 31 days. My theme is "This My Single Life," with a focus on the blessings of this season. Hopefully it's obvious to anyone who knows me or has read my blog that I want to be married and have kids. But at 32 years old, I am quite single, and I think it's God-glorifying to highlight the good things God has given me with singleness. Click here to access the links for my 31 days of writing! And if you want to read everyone else's blog posts, go to http://write31days.com/ and click "Linking Up" for the categories!

Friday, October 27, 2017

227: sounds in the night

I am thankful that I still live at home for a bit longer where late at night I can hear a train from the middle of town whistling and moaning and clattering by. I love that sound.

This is my single life. Same neighborhood noises as when I was little, and  I love these sounds in the night.

I am participating in "Write 31 Days," where a bunch of bloggers write...for 31 days. My theme is "This My Single Life," with a focus on the blessings of this season. Hopefully it's obvious to anyone who knows me or has read my blog that I want to be married and have kids. But at 32 years old, I am quite single, and I think it's God-glorifying to highlight the good things God has given me with singleness. Click here to access the links for my 31 days of writing! And if you want to read everyone else's blog posts, go to http://write31days.com/ and click "Linking Up" for the categories!

Thursday, October 26, 2017

226: no family - what??

If we must be thankful for little favors, I am thankful that I don't have any family I need to get home to.

Tonight is our school's Fall Concert. Which means, school ended about an hour ago, and I need to be back here in about 2 hours, but with the commute and teacher-y responsibilities, I generally stay, and currently am staying, here on campus until these evening events. I don't run back home and then come back.

However, if I had a family, instead of going about classroom stuff and calming down from a full day while waiting for the fundraiser dinner in 20 minutes, I would be thinking about my family, calling home, feeling guilty for staying. Or, I would be running home, getting dinner ready, preparing everyone to come to school. I actually don't know what it would be like if I had a family while working. But, I know that aspect of life would be consuming a lot more brainpower than is currently being used (because I'm pretty brain-dead from this week of work).

So, today, as a single with an evening work commitment, I am thankful I do not have a family. If only because I do not need to split my focus between tonight's event and home.

What are you doing today that would be harder to do if you were not single?
It is okay.
 
Reaping the benefits of one season does not disqualify you from experiencing a change in seasons. Enjoying today does not mean you're not willing to enjoy a different kind of tomorrow.
 
 
At school we are learning about God's name I AM. We read Exodus 6 for Bible today.
 
I am participating in "Write 31 Days," where a bunch of bloggers write...for 31 days. My theme is "This My Single Life," with a focus on the blessings of this season. Hopefully it's obvious to anyone who knows me or has read my blog that I want to be married and have kids. But at 32 years old, I am quite single, and I think it's God-glorifying to highlight the good things God has given me with singleness. Click here to access the links for my 31 days of writing! And if you want to read everyone else's blog posts, go to http://write31days.com/ and click "Linking Up" for the categories!

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

225: no clue

Today I finished listening to the three broadcasts Family Life Today just did with Joshua Harris about I Kissed Dating Goodbye. Can you believe the book is 20 years old? They discuss what was good about his book, what was misleading, and how people have been helped and hurt by its influence.

I am thankful that I have ridden the waves of "dating is worldly, courtship is Biblical" to today's "if you ask me out to coffee, I won't consider it a marriage proposal, and if I agree, I hope you won't take it as serious interest. But secretly I'll be thinking of everything through the lens of a potential marriage." I am thankful that I have lived through enough micro-cultural dating-courtship-betrothal-etc. fads that I now have absolutely no idea how matches are made, love forms, or marriage occurs. I could have become a legalistic, formula-based, married know-it-all. I don't know any marrieds like that, but I'm pretty sure I could have nailed it. Seriously. Instead, I'm a clueless single at the mercy of Providence, because I am realizing more and more how imperfect and insufficient I am to change my status.

It's not a bad place to be, right? At a loss on your own? Dependent on God's sovereignty, sanctifying power, and wise counsel?

This is my single life. Learning, dependent, but really, no clue.

What inadequacy are you thankful for in a weird sort of way?

~*~
I am participating in "Write 31 Days," where a bunch of bloggers write...for 31 days. My theme is "This My Single Life," with a focus on the blessings of this season. Hopefully it's obvious to anyone who knows me or has read my blog that I want to be married and have kids. But at 32 years old, I am quite single, and I think it's God-glorifying to highlight the good things God has given me with singleness. Click here to access the links for my 31 days of writing! And if you want to read everyone else's blog posts, go to http://write31days.com/ and click "Linking Up" for the categories!