I know two, no, three things about love.
1. I don't have a clue about it.
2. It's a mystery.
3. It's amazing.
I heard Candice Watters quote Proverbs 30 in an old Boundless podcast episode today. It reminded me of what I do know about love, namely, that it is mysterious.
"There are three things which are too wonderful for me,
Yes, four which I do not understand:
. . . the way of a man with a virgin." (vv 18-19)
What draws two people together out of all the people in the world? I don't know. I have tried before to make myself love someone. (I mean, isn't love a choice?) I have almost tried to manipulate my brain. I thought that if I relaxed that the feeling would come. It didn't. Instead I felt like I was going mad.
So I don't know how it happens. Crushes I know. Chemical attractions, yes. True-blue love? Still an unconquered wilderness.
Tonight at community group a mom was saying how she used to think Proverbs 7 was about some prostitute on the bad side of town.
"With her enticing speech she caused him to yield,
With her flattering lips she seduced him.
Immediately he went after her, as an ox goes to the slaughter" (vv 21-22)
Now she realizes that all women have an amazing power over men. That is a mystery to me too. Why do logical, sensible, controlled men fall head over heels with emotional, talkative, melodramatic women? (By the way, those are extremes and generalizations for the sake of contrast.) Men and women are different, sometimes quite different, so how do they go together? Why do they even want to go together?
That's the big mystery.
And, yet, true committed love is amazing. A friend's boyfriend told me the story of how they met. (Clarification: They are both adults in their 30s and are heading towards marriage, not just young pups who will break up next week.) When he got to the part where he asked her out and she said yes, I interrupted with, "And you were head over heels?"
"Oh, I still am," he said. "I've been head over heels ever since."
(collective "awwww!")
Perhaps I shouldn't try to write about that which I know nothing about. But I can still make observations and wonder philosophically about it.
Oh, but I do know one other thing about love! It is a divine gift from God to mankind.
(I would like to add here that I believe a guy truly loved me once, and I consider it an extreme blessing from God that I have been allowed to experience that no matter what my future holds.)
Bravo! Good post, Michelle! It is crazy how two people actually come like each other! Like you, I too am blessed to know what it's like to truly be loved by a guy, albeit the wrong guy. It truly is amazing and like the song says, makes you do crazy thing! Hopefully we'll get there again someday, eh? ;)
ReplyDeleteOh, Michelle. As far as trying to get the feeling to come, hoping it would, trying to manipulate it: it could be compared to finding one's wedding dress (though obviously they are not equal feelings, of course). Brides-to-be often worry about not getting "the feeling," having to push it, psyching themselves out, over-thinking, etc. (see Say Yes to the Dress). But one does not have to. If anyone's an over-thinker, it's me--and when I put on my wedding dress, I KNEW. It knocked me over when I didn't even see it coming. Similarly, if you have to make yourself love someone, it ain't the one. ;) I'm a firm believer that God has a specific person in mind for those who He plans to be married, not an endless list that we have to pick from and just hope and pray we made the wisest choice we could. You. will. know.
ReplyDeleteThat's my take. Love you. :)
Thank you, Kellie and Kacie, for your comments!
ReplyDeleteKacie, I've watched Say Yes to the Dress so, hehe, it's rather encouraging to know you as an over-thinker had that "moment." You didn't over-think Daniel?
Well, suffice it to say that I was not myself for a big part of while we were dating, between adjusting to medications and depression, so that messed with my thinking a lot. (oooh, that sounds really encouraging... :P) But add that to my overthinking, and sure, within a year and a half of dating, I had plenty of time to over-think him at times, but it's normal to stop and take stock of your relationship and think now and then. And I did do that (maybe not as logically on the prescriptions :P), but once we really got to know each other more and more (basically like 9 months into dating), it was purty clear. So, you may not know right away like with a wedding dress (sorry if that's what I implied earlier), but you certainly won't feel like you're forcing yourself to feel things if he's the one. It will just FEEL right.
ReplyDeleteP.S. I think the song "When the Right One Comes Along" by Clare Bowen sums it up fairly well. ;)